Post by Lucian Graymark on May 31, 2013 18:13:47 GMT -7
As he made his way carefully across the grounds that surrounded Graymark Manor, Luke winced in pain with every step that he took. The transformations were as painful as ever and he wondered, not for the first time whether Downworlders had some trick to withstanding the pain. Though he had combed the Circle's archives and notes as thoroughly as he could without drawing suspicion onto himself, Luke had yet to find much information on werewolves and the details of the transformation that took place every month at the full moon. He couldn't very well just ask either, that approach would definitely not go over well with anyone.
Sighing softly, he gently lowered himself onto the grass and tilted his head up towards the sun, closing his eyes. The worst part of his condition wasn't the transformations, it was lying to his friends about it. Each time he did the guilt threatened to make him confess and beg for their forgiveness. The absolute trust that they showed in him, just made everything ten times worse. Sometimes he wondered if it wouldn't have been better to just take his life like he'd originally planned when he first discovered the bite. It would have made things easier on him and the ones he cared about who were sure to despise him and drive him to suicide after learning of his condition. The only thing that prevented him from doing it now, now that neither Jocelyn nor Valentine needed him, was Lukas. He couldn't put the boy through the loss of yet another person close to him, and the thought that Lukas didn't care that he was a werewolf have him some comfort at least.
Sighing softly, he gently lowered himself onto the grass and tilted his head up towards the sun, closing his eyes. The worst part of his condition wasn't the transformations, it was lying to his friends about it. Each time he did the guilt threatened to make him confess and beg for their forgiveness. The absolute trust that they showed in him, just made everything ten times worse. Sometimes he wondered if it wouldn't have been better to just take his life like he'd originally planned when he first discovered the bite. It would have made things easier on him and the ones he cared about who were sure to despise him and drive him to suicide after learning of his condition. The only thing that prevented him from doing it now, now that neither Jocelyn nor Valentine needed him, was Lukas. He couldn't put the boy through the loss of yet another person close to him, and the thought that Lukas didn't care that he was a werewolf have him some comfort at least.